Slurry Beta

Infrequent ruminations on nothing.

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Steven Seagal!

While we all eagerly anticipate "Under Siege 3: Plane Danger" (yes, they're actually planning to make it and yes, that's the tentative title), I just wanted to let all you Steve Heads out there know that he's on tour playing blues-reggae music at a club near you (see photos below). He's also signing autographs after the show so don't forget to bring your VHS copy of "Hard to Kill". In celebration, I have enlisted Bobby Digital to write a review of his most recent album*, which I am almost positive he has. I am also currently drafting the greatest Steven Seagal story you will ever read.


*Bob, will you please write a reveiw of Steven Seagal's latest release? Thanks.

6 Comments:

At 7:39 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Not sure if you knew this Brian, but there's a sleepy little town in MT, which is Steven's fishing getaway. That's their plane to fame.

 
At 12:45 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Steve Segal is a true patriot, I'm appalled that you would speak ill of his hobbies after all he's done to protect your freedom, tracking down and killing america's enemies stressful, and steven needs to unwind. god bless that man.

 
At 11:54 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Steven Segal and Slurry have many more connections than Slurry is interested in posting at this time...that little escapade with DMX on the set of "Exit Wounds" ...remember Slurry your Ultimate Fantasy?

 
At 12:01 PM, Blogger Slurry B said...

The last comment is arguably the dumbest thing I have ever read. I feel like my blog is only read by third graders and Mormon angels.

 
At 10:50 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

When can we expect the post featuring Steven Seagal slash Mafioso ties slash Beach Boys slash Sergeant Peppers Grand Unifying Theory of Bullshit?

 
At 3:57 PM, Blogger Slurry B said...

Sean, you offend me.

Everyone knows that the Steven Seagal Mafia Theory has nothing to do with my Brian Wilson Phillips Theory regarding his alleged (repeat, ALLEGED!) drift into a multi-year barbituate hermit haze after he felt Pet Sounds was catastrophically one-upped by SPLHCB yet, strangely, he conceived a daughter at the same time that went on to become 1/3 of early 90s recording sensation Wilson Phillips. Talk about red flags!

This will all come out in the wash in due time, my friend. And you will be the one with egg on your face. I just need to fill a few gaps in the theory...

 

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