I've Got Nothing
As the title indicates, I've got nothing. For the past few weeks I've had no grand epiphanies, revelations or any sort of inspiration whatsoever to come up with a decent blog post. And judging by the swell of emails from my vast readership, nobody gives a shit. That's fine, really. I've been doing some soul searching and have decided to make a few changes to this blog's content. As you can see, I changed the design to read "Put this in your pipe and smoke it" under the title Slurry Beta. Good times. Also, I can't write about music or the indie-rock concert scene anymore because it has recently come to my attention that I have been completely ripping off Chuck Klosterman's "Fargo Rock City." While it was nice to finally read a book that defines me as a human being, it was a little disheartening to discover that I had essentially stolen some pop culture analysis techniques and selfishly used them to increase my blog's popularity. I have since canceled all sponsorship deals and, from now on, this blog will only be personalized horoscopes and pictures of antique hats culled from the Internet.
HOROSCOPES:
Erik Nelson: You will call me once in awhile and attempt to convince me why I should retain your friendship.
Andy Levin: You will go to the Rogue Wave concert and buy me a night's worth of beers.
Gray: You will redeem yourself after being a lousy person when I was in NYC and visit Washington.
Hope those were insightful! They came to me in a dream last night. I'm merely a conduit.
ANTIQUE HAT:
COMMENTS
John: thanks for the comment. I would just like to say that, on a classically macroscopic and modernly microscopic level, you are comprised of upstanding liquids, solutions, and interfaces.
Brian, I respect your bold move to the horoscopes, though warn you of the dangers in personal advice. Horoscopes are safer left as too vague to even be boring blurbs on what you should spend at Wal-mart that will make America safer for its true partiots. Need I remind you of Mr. Bailey's "urge to touch (teach) older kids?" There was a lawsuit threat!
Now if I may, you east coast kids are so well read! Consider yourselves lucky because never will you have to come to grips with the fact that your entire being is encompased by "Everybody Poops." It will be okay, I mean, its true! I guess thats enough for me.
Holy shit! This is my first read of this blog, and what did I do last night? Called Brian to try and retain his freindship. Creepy. Slurry Beta knows all, tells some.
posted by Slurry B @ 9:13 PM
Man, that is one nice hat. My grandpa had one just like it. I think the book that defines me as a human being is entitled "liquids, Solutions, and Interfaces: From classical macroscopic descriptions to modern microscopic details". This too is "a little disheartening"